A not so happy birthday

never in my 37 years of existence has somebody every ruined my birthday until now. Instead of feeling happy I am now full of anger in my heart because of one person who provoked like no one else ever has. Why did it have to be like this? This person whom I thought is my friend turns out to be one big bully. There is nothing that hurts more than being treated like trash on your birthday by someone you cared about. I will never forget this day and what that person did to me.

Birthday Musings

I woke up this morning and realized that I am a year older. My goodness! I'm 37 years old already! Is this a dream or a nightmare? They say that we gain more wisdom as we grow old so I guess I am thankful for that. I still have a lot of things that I want to do and accomplish before I turn 40. Settling down is one of them of course. =) Other things would include winning a gold medal in the national judo championships, go sky diving, etc and do missionary work in Japan.

It only seems like yesterday that I was a young kid. Time flies indeed. I am an adult and I have set aside childish ways behind me. I am an adult with lots of responsibilities. I hope to draw more closer to the Lord as the days go by especially as I share the good news of the gospel to my fellow athletes. The experiences that I've had, the skills that I acquired, the friends that I have are all part of what I am today, a disciple of the Lord Jesus Christ. I look back over my years that have gone by and thank the Lord for everything that was and about to come.

The growing up years.

I love looking at old photos of me and the family. makes me want to go back to those years and re-live my childhood. =) I'm also fond of seeing how I looked back then and now.

This is me all through out those years. How I've grown up!

From infant to toddler to adult.

Sailing through a stormy week.

The past week has not been good for me. The struggles that I face has all of a sudden intensified. I had face several instances that really tested my patience and my life as a Christian and I failed miserably. Just when I thought things were going bad and I'm almost out of the eye of the storm, another one came this afternoon gushing in like a strong wave which got me depressed again.

Other people may ask me, where id your God in this storm? he has abandoned you! I have to admit that sometimes I would have those thoughts but I would be always reminded that there is a God who is with me every step of the way. I guess you could say that I don't want to give up hope easily. Today, God has closed a door for me but he will open a window for me to see that there is hope. That He is in control.

I have already proven to my self that time and time again I would fail whenever I would assume the position of the helm of my life but I would always end up crashing and burning. God is not finish with me yet, I am a work in progress and I would cling on to my hope in God and refuse my soul to be downcast.

John's homecoming E.B/Camp V5 Reunion.

Back in 1999 a group of young adults (maybe not all) started a movement to bring back a childhood classic on Television which is Voltes V. These people had a series of EB's (Eye Balls) because none of them know each other except through the internet. The group is called Camp V5, a Voltes V and other Robot Anime fan group. It has been years since we last saw each other until last night. One of our members, John Paras is here on vation from the states so we took the opportunity to have a little reunion.

It was great seeing old and not so old faces. I'm a little sad that not everyone made it to our get together. Some were stuck at work, some were out of town or the country and some we lost contact.

A few of us looks different now compared to when we first met, especially me and Francis. Francis has lost a lot of weight even though he didn't have much before., His hair looks different now as well as his eyes. He looks Chinese now.

I on the other hand lost a lot of weight and got rid of my thick Clark Kent type glasses in exchange for contacts. We had dinner at Shakey's El Pueblo and had a few trivia games courstesy of John. Correct answers to his trivia questions got prizes which includes, Voltes V and Mazinger Z shirts, Robot anime music CD's, posters, and a whole bunch of M &M milk chocolates.

I got to bring home a mazinger Z T-shirt, a CD and 4 packs of M & M's. John will be heading back to the states in a week or two so we won't see him again until next February. I am hoping though that the gang so is still here in the country can meet up regularly and do what we always love to do. Get together for dinner and talk and talk and talk, go to i.O. KTV for Backstreet Boys and Jackie Chung songs. Ahhh... those were the days and I miss them. Let's get together again my fellow Voltes V fanatics!

Athletes In Action at PLM

Yesterday, I once again had the privilege of serving the Lord through my ministry with Athletes In Action. We conducted a team building seminar for the Pamantasan ng Lunsod ng Maynila (University of the City of Manila). It was fun to see the students enjoy the difficult physical challenges that we had them do and discuss what they learned in the process. We did the same activities with other schools but this is the first time I have seen people get a little hurt from doing the activities. I am just thankful that no injuries were sustained and that we all had a good laugh afterwards.

Coach Arcenio Tado shared his experiences as a former member of the national cycling team and head coach, While Kuya Mon shared his life testimony as a cancer survivor and how the Lord is using him right now to make a difference by serving him.

I also conducted a short lecture about the athlete coach relationship and showed the students how important it is to have the proper respect and understanding from both the athlete and the coach in order to make things work.

Coach Ryan then explained how someone can have a  personal relationship with Christ. It is my prayer that the message that Ryan shared will make an impact and a difference on the lives of the student athletes of PLM.

United we stand. maybe...

My initial book review of the book "How now shall we live" by Charles Colson

Different life systems compete for our minds. Unless we consciously and consistently choose a biblical system for seeing all of life, we will be influenced by destructive world views around us. - Taken from Charles Colson's "How now shall we live?"


This is a truth that we cannot deny.  The question is, whose voice are we listening to? Are we so blinded by the world's standards? Most of us don't see life and everything that goes on around us from a biblical point of view. We would rather see the world from our own understanding, from our own point of view rather than what the bible tells us. 


The human race have become so obscure to the ideas of Christian teachings; we see it as something that is not applicable or not to be followed at all because the teachings are old. Some would say that biblical teachings are not to be taken seriously. people who say such things are blinded by this world we live in. We only see what we want to see.


I just started doing a series of studies at church today on Charles Colson's book "How now shall we live?" The book shows us how to understand biblical faith as an entire world view, a perspective on all of life. I am still in the first unit of this book but it has already given me a lot to think about. How do you define world view? In order to answer that, we have to ask ourselves three questions to give more meaning to our own definition: 

• Where do we come from?
• What has gone wrong?
• What can we do about it?

Know the answers to these questions and you will come up with a clear understanding of your worldview. There are however two ways we can answer these questions. Do we answer them from a naturalist world view or from a biblical world view?  The study also tells us that Worldview controls what we see. Our worldview serves as the lens through which we see our circumstances and events. Our worldvieew controls the media of our minds. It filters information and colors what we perceive. Intriguing huh? I'm looking forward to studying some more as the days go by.

I'm guilty for craving for an SLR Camera.

Is it a sin to desire for something that you do not have? I am a person who is very much interested in the art of photography> I want to master immortalize life's fine and not so fine moments and be artistic about it. The best way to do this is with the use of an SLR camera which can do wonders for an aspiring photographer like me.

Since I do not have one, I just make use of my point and shoot digital camera which acts as my video camera as well. I am not sure if the Lord would want to bless me with a digital camera cause I have to be honest that it is more of a desire rather than a need. I  envy people who can take great photographs using an SLR camera and show off their work.

Lord, I am not demanding that you give me an SLR Camera to satisfy my desire. Only if it is your will, Oh Lord. May your will be done in my life. For now, I will try my best to be content with the blessings that come along my way.

Summer heat and Global Warming.

Summer hasn't started yet but most Filipinos can already feel the heat. The weird thing is there wasn't any gradual change in the temperature but an immediate one. It's like the weather suddenly changed at the snap of a finger. I wonder how hot it would be when march and April arrives. It looks like we are in for a long hot summer here in the Philippines.

The weird weather can be blamed on global warming I guess, our planet is not what is used to be partly because of the fossil fuels we are burning and of course, irresponsibility on the part of us humans. We have not been responsible enough in taking care of our blue planet. I am proud of the fact that I am not a contributor to this destructive climate change because I don't drive, I ride my bicycle wherever I go. I do my part to make a difference in this world we live in and I wish that more people would do so.

I wish I didn't react the way I did.

My day went to a bad start. Anger has gotten the best out of me today and I really feel bad about it. I have said some things which I never should have said. I am one of those people who really gets mad when provoked and would say and do nasty things. I envy people who can stay calm in the midst of a situation wherein his or her ego is bruised.

I have gained more patience with people as the years have gone but I am still a work in progress, I have yet to master my emotions so as not to let the hulk inside of me get lose. I wish I could just turn back the hands of time and undo the damage but I guess the Lord wants me to learn from my mistakes. I'm just hard headed at times. I regret saying the things that I said this morning. I was provoked yes but that doesn't justify the hurting words that I have said. No body deserves to be treated like a low life.

When friends bail out of your life.

When I was watching episode 6 of The TV series the walking dead, one of the characters said something that struck me. When one of their companions decided to quit in life and die, her friend told her that "It is not fair for you to make someone care and then bail out." This was exactly what happened to me a couple of years ago. I met someone who became close to me, she even called me her big brother and we spent time with each other. We met in a conference while vacationing from the states. She made me feel so special, It was like having a younger sister who cared. All was going well for a couple of months then something strange happened.

A month before she left for the states, I didn't receive any communication from her. I even texted her when something happened to me that really got me down but she already a different person at that time; I was already getting a cold shoulder treatment from her. Days turned into weeks and I hardly heard from her until she left without even saying good bye. My birthday came and there wasn't even any greeting from her. I asked my self what was going on but I didn't have any answers. More than a year has passed, she came back here for a visit but she never bothered to contact me. She was in and out of the country without letting me know that she as here.

I sent her a message through facebook asking her if I did something wrong and that I was sorry for anything that I could have done. She said that I didn't do anything wrong and that she was sorry for not touching base with me but she didn't answer my question about why she didn't say good bye when she went back to the states. I then found out that she was already going steady with a common friend. Don't get me wrong here, I wasn't jealous or anything, I treated her like a younger sister and she calls me kuya. There was even a time that she said that I will always be her kuya whenever she is here in the country.

I am jealous over the fact that I was forgotten. She made me care for her then she bailed out of my life without any explanation. Call me sensitive but it really hurts. It ain't fair. I moved on and tried to forget about her but the memory of her still haunts me till now. I have a younger sister but she treats me like trash, my own flesh and blood. Then there was her who made me feel like I had a wonderful, younger sister; but the feeling only lasted for a short time. Why did something like this had to happen? I don't have the answers and I might never get them; I'm just holding on to my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ who promised never to leave of forsake me. Friends may come and go and forget all about you but Christ never will.

What does the bible say about suicide?

In Matthew 11:28, Jesus says, “Come to me all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” He knows that this life is difficult, so He wants to remove the burdens we carry. We may suffer for a little while, there may be great pain at times, but Jesus will carry us through the hard times. He promises, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you" (Heb. 13:5b). Remember that, no matter how bleak a situation may appear, it is only temporary in the scope of eternity with Christ. Rest in that hope, that promise.

Taking your own life because you are in despair only means that you have failed to put your trust and hope in the Lord. God created us so who are we to say that we know better? Can the invention say to the inventor how he is suppose to function? Proverbs 3:5-6 says Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. 

The Bible may not directly say that suicide is a sin but what are your motives for doing so? Some people may say that it is the honorable and courageous thing to do but the ones who say this are only basing this on their own understanding.

is suicide an act of bravery?

I was watching the news earlier and a former president said that Angelo Reyes' action of taking his own life was an act of bravery. I hope that someone can tell me that I need to clean my ears cause if what I heard was correct then that person is actually saying that suicide is the right thing to do in some cases. Has that man lost his mind? Taking your own life will not solve anything! Now pardon me for saying this but suicide is an act of a coward!

What does someone do when he is faced with forces beyond his control and the pressure piles up? He takes the easy way out is that it? Some people are just to afraid to face the music. What does that say about them? he Filipinos can be to kind when something tragic happens to someone by paying our respects. Are we so kind that we are not mindful of our words anymore? Are we to kind that we would say something nice about something that is bad?

Now I don't know if Secretary Angelo Reyes is guilty or not of the accusations made against him but bailing out when the going gets tough is not an act of bravery. He has chosen the easy way out by killing him self without regard for his character and without regard for his family. Angelo Reyes is not a Samurai who can redeem his honor by taking his own life though he might have seen it that way. Your guess is as good as mine.

. I am sad that something like this has happened and my heart goes out to his family. Bravery is not the absence of fear, Bravery is doing what is right in the presence of fear. Has Secretary Angelo Reyes truly done a brave and honorable thing by taking his own life? I think not.

We Filipinos claim and are proud to be called the only Christian country in Asia; but is this really true? What does the bible say about suicide anyway? Life belongs to god. It is never our place to take our own life or someone else's life.


Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own, you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body (1 Corinthians 6:19-20). Are we honoring God by taking our own life?




What should we do when faced with life's difficulties? I can tell you right now that the solution to despair is NOT suicide, but FAITH in God.


We wait in hope for the Lord; He is our help and our shield. In Him, our hearts rejoice, for we trust in His Holy Name. may your unfailing love be with us, Lord, even as we put our hope in you. - Psalm 33:20-22


Jesus also promised us that he will give us rest from our problems. Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest - Matthew 11:28. All people who professes to be a Christian should adhere to Christ's teaching. Do we really put our hope in Jesus or take the easy way out? 

An Unwanted Visitor.

We were awaken this morning at 3:30 by a loud crash. When I jumped out of my bed to investigate, I saw my two cats fighting with a stray cat that fell from a portion of our second floor our ceiling. Our ceiling was torn like a cardboard. Apparently, that's why the cat made it inside our house. It looked like he was trapped on our roof.

The cat ran in panic right under my legs and towards my bed in a vain effort to get out the window which was of course closed. he went back outside and ran through my two cats who were waiting for him. There was a chase all through out the kitchen and the living room until I opened the front door and chased the unwanted "cat burglar" with a broom outside the house.

I got scared for a moment when I heard the crash for fear that my Mom may have fallen down the stairs. I called out her name and I was relief to hear and see that she was in her bedroom safe. This little incident was somewhat scary and funny at the same time. We all went back to bed and looked for a carpenter later on to fix our ceiling.

Life lessons from the past.

Don't you just wish sometimes that you can turn back the clock and correct the mistakes that you have made? I have done a lot of things in the past which I am not proud of and I have often wondered what would my life be like right now if I have done things differently in the past. All the things we did would have a profound effect on how we live today right? The decisions we have made, the way we conducted our selves, the kid of food that we ate, the friends that we had etc.

Michael J. Fox's character in the movie back to the future had a chance to set things right when he traveled back in time when he came across a time machine. When I saw that movie I was like Wow! I wish I could get to do that! But then again the sad truth would always hit us right in the face. We have to learn from our mistakes. Now that is reality. All the things that have happened before are suppose to shape us for our future. We can't just snap our fingers and fix the things that we have done wrong; there is a lesson to be learned. A valuable lesson which we can only learn from the past.